Help Each Other Play

I’m on a book deadline (more about that, including ways to get involved soon!), but I couldn’t wait to share something that’s been joyfully taking shape: Wallywich, my new vegan ice cream sandwich pop-up in DC. Yes just in time for winter :D.

You can follow along on Instagram and feel invited to join the inaugural session this Saturday Nov 1 from 2:30-4 @ Unity park as part of AdMo porchfest

This whole thing started as play. A decade of dinner parties and kitchen experiment with ice cream than turned into vegan ice cream when I became fully plant based in 2020. It’s fun, it’s silly. It may not work. But, if I do say so, the homemade ice cream and cookies are delicious and 1+1= at least 3.

I’m proud of myself. But I want to emphasize something: this is only real because of you, the people who helped me play.

Like Kirk, a dear friend who left his government job to start Captain Cookie and the Milkman a decade ago and built an amazing business from it. Or my friends and family who not only tolerate my veganism but join me in it, stretching themselves to make things vegan for my potlucks or when they have me over for dinner, and excitedly tasting my experiments. (Let’s just say the mythical cauliflower mousse was…awful. Sorry.) Or ex girlfriends who have inspired and encouraged me, and still do.

And my family who stock and create separate vegan dishes for me not because they fully understand it, but because they love me. And how blessed I am to have Walnut, my dog that models play without attachment to outcome. She is the most reluctantly vegan of all of us—she puts up with a lot.

Every scoop of this project is a reminder to me that play only works in community. I dont have to tell you that trying something new is vulnerable. The internal narrative sounds like this: What if people don’t like it and I fail? What if I commit to this but then give up, or just get tired? Shouldn’t I just do something normal like everyone else…it looks better on LinkedIn.

Forget LinkedIn: we need each other to keep going. Here’s a few things I’ve learned about helping each other play, mainly from receiving this care:

1. Ask them. Real curiosity is a gift. Ask someone what they’re tinkering with, how they got the idea, why this and not that. My friend Elle is getting into theater producing and our conversation about how it differs from acting lit me up.
2. Join them. It can be lonely to start something. If they want to get into ceramics, go to a class with them. It’s time well spent for you both regardless of if their work ends up in Crate and Barrel. And if your friend is working on a food business, we need all the taste testers so it’s win-win.
3. Support them. My friend Sean might be the best at this, he buys shirts, jewelery, stickers, and candles from makers markers all the time, and I doubt he needs them all. But more than that, he talks to creators, asks about their process, and reflects back what he loves about their craft. You don’t need to buy the thing to help people feel seen for stepping out on a limb and playing.

Play takes courage. It’s how we bring new things—and new parts of ourselves—into the world. It’s also what Howard Thurman meant when he wrote: “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

That aliveness is what play really is. The spark that gets us to try, to risk, to create a failed cauliflower mousse (it really was a disaster, sorry again) but to not hang up the whisk for good. To launch a vegan ice cream sandwich pop up because I love showing people that joyful delicious food need not contain animal products. To leave my government job to be a writer and speaker, and trust that people like you would take the time to read and subscribe. It’s my reminder that none of us ever do anything alone. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

💛Alex

If you’re reading this, I’d love to hear: what’s something vulnerable you’re playing with or would like? And how can I help you? Drop it in the comments or send me a DM.